


Together?

by Fire_Cat



Series: Lost and Found [6]
Category: The Yogscast
Genre: Again with the ton of dialogue, Aliens, Little bit of Fluff, M/M, i don't really know how to tag this..
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-01
Updated: 2016-06-01
Packaged: 2018-07-11 10:47:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,188
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7045366
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fire_Cat/pseuds/Fire_Cat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Xephos himself was always coming and going, though Strife was never entirely sure where he went. He’d occasionally take Strife for walks around the area, showing him the beauties of this weird and wonderful world that he’d made his home. Sometimes, he would take Honeydew with him, and when they returned, Xephos would often be closed off and easily agitated, snapping at anything. Diamond eyes tinted red and a nasty scowl on his face.</p>
<p>(In which Strife realises how much Xephos has changed, and isn't so keen on it. They later talk about where they stand now relationship wise.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Together?

**Author's Note:**

> The last part of this little series. It's a bit longer than I originally intended, but oh well, I'm pretty happy with it as a whole. Enjoy :)

A week passed rather uneventfully, Strife mostly kept to himself, staying in his room and just generally avoiding everyone else in the house when he could. Xephos would come and talk to him frequently, occasionally spiking up a conversation that lead them to chatting about something that happened back on Lumi, though it all seemed like a lifetime ago now. Xephos had given Strife his old starship insignia, which still carried working translation tech, so he could talk to the others without relying on Xephos for translations. Though he rarely bothered to talk to anyone, so it didn’t see much use.

Xephos seemed to have quite a wide variety of friends, many of whom dropped by from time to time. There was Honeydew, who lived with Xephos, the two seemed to be very close and Xephos had explained that the dwarf was the first native that he’d met. 

There was another male, blonde and about the same height as Strife, scruffy and always wearing a tattered labcoat and goggles, his name was Lalna and he was a scientist, he visited quite often and seemed to be good friends with Xephos and Honeydew. He appeared to be quite smart, though rather annoyingly interested in what Strife had to say about Lumian technology and society. 

There was a female, also blonde and very slightly taller than Xephos, she had huge, tawny wings spreading out from her back, and she’d fly all over the place. Her name was Lomadia, and she seemed to know a lot about the wildlife on this planet. Xephos had said that she ran an owl sanctuary on an island somewhere, though Strife wasn’t really sure what that meant.

There were two males that Strife had only met once, briefly when they’d come storming into the house, shouting and swearing and joking around like a pair of teenagers. They were both shorter than Strife, one about the same height as Xephos, the other a few inches taller than him. The shorter of the two was dark-haired and had grey skin, his name was Sips and he seemed far too interested in who Strife was. His accent was considerably different to everyone else’s too, and Strife figured that he was from some place else. The taller of the two was also dark-haired, his skin lightly tanned, his ears were long and pointed, longer than Strife or Xephos’, though he wasn’t Lumian, as that was the only similarity he had. His name was Sjin, and whilst he wasn’t quite as loud as his friend he was still rather obnoxious, laughing at everything. He was also quite clumsy and kept tripping over his own feet, as well as bumping into a table and knocking a mug from the counter within the twenty minutes he was there. Everyone seemed thrilled when they left, Xephos especially. Though Strife wasn’t entirely sure why they had even come in the first place.

Strife had heard other voices coming from downstairs that he didn’t recognise, had picked up other names of people he assumed were Xephos’ friends. Nano, Ridge, Martyn, Tom, Nilesy, Parvis, as well as others, one of which, someone called Lying that Strife hadn’t actually seen, had resulted in a lot of shouting and swearing on Xephos’ part, and Honeydew had seemed wary of the blue-eyed Lumian for the rest of the day. Strife had seen and heard something new in Xephos then, an aggressive tone in his voice that didn’t seem right, and a flicker of red in his eyes that Strife hadn’t seen before.

Xephos himself was always coming and going, though Strife was never entirely sure where he went. He’d occasionally take Strife for walks around the area, showing him the beauties of this weird and wonderful world that he’d made his home. Sometimes, he would take Honeydew with him, and when they returned, Xephos would often be closed off and easily agitated, snapping at anything. Diamond eyes tinted red and a nasty scowl on his face. He was always wearing a long white lab coat when he came home like this, stained with all sorts of colours, though mostly red, which was concerning. Strife had learnt that human blood was red, which opened up a lot of questions as to what exactly Xephos did with his time nowadays.

* * *

 One evening, when Strife had been left at the house again. Xephos and Honeydew had gone out to where ever it was they went that morning, and he’d been left with Lomadia, he didn’t mind too much, she seemed nice enough, if not a bit strict sometimes. He mostly stayed upstairs though, reading about this planet, it’s people and it’s language. Strife agreed with Xephos when he’d said that the language was an arse, but he was getting there, he’d never found languages all that difficult.

Strife had been walking downstairs to get something to drink from the kitchen, when he heard the front door open. He stopped on the stairs and listened, wondering who it was.

“Rough day?” Said Lomadia, the translation tech in Xephos’ badge allowing him to understand her speech.

“I’m fine.” Said Xephos as Strife heard the door close. He sounded tired and fed-up. Strife walked slowly to the bottom of the stairs, peering around the corner to see what was going on, though hoping that they wouldn’t see him.

“You look tired, Xeph. Where’s Dew?” Lomadia asked, Strife saw her smile slightly. 

Xephos rolled his eyes. “He’s still at YogLabs, he passed out and I figured it’d be easier just to leave him there, I’ll go get him in the morning.” He said simply, his voice flat but his eyes were shifting to a deep ruby-red.

“Rright.” Said Lomadia, sounding unsure. “If you say so.”

“Yeah, I do, he’s fine, all right. Don’t worry about it.” Xephos scowled, sounding more and more annoyed as his tail began to flick back and forth dangerously at his ankles.

“Well, no, it's not all right really, whenever you say ‘don’t worry about it’, more often than not, there’s something that we should be worrying about.” Lomadia frowned, crossing her arms across her chest.

“You don’t trust me, do you? You don’t trust that I know what I’m doing!” Xephos practically snarled, stepping closer to Lomadia, though she didn’t even flinch at the advance. “Dew’s my best friend I know what’s best for him!”

“Xeph, when you’re like this I don’t trust you with yourself yet alone anybody else.” Lomadia said, shaking her head, her voice remarkably calm. “You need to go and get some rest, ok, go and sleep and calm down. Instead of pulling out of bottle of gin and drinking yourself to sleep, which I know that you do sometimes when you’re stressed so don’t even try to lie to me.” Her voice was growing firmer, but not louder.

“You think so little of me.” Xephos said, a rather sinister laugh escaping his throat. “You don’t trust me, you think that you can boss me around and tell me what to do. You’re supposed to be my _friend_ , Lomadia, and that’s not what friends do.”

“I am your friend, Xephos, but not when you’re acting like a jerk. Now go to bed before I carry you up there.” Said Lomadia. Strife wouldn't put it past her to pick Xephos up with little issue.

“I’m not a child!” Xephos almost yelled, red light flaring in his eyes and across his face, clenching his hands into fists at his sides. For a moment, Strife thought that he was going to hit her.

“Then stop acting like one!” Lomadia snapped back, raising her voice very slightly, glaring at Xephos with a look that could kill. Her wings quivering slightly behind her.

“You’re not my mother.” Xephos growled, his voice suddenly eerily quiet.

"No, I'm not, and neither's Dew, yet we still end up looking after you when you screw up." She glared at him for a moment before she sighed and shook her head. "Just go to bed Xeph, you're tired and stressed, you'll feel better for it in the morning." She said, her voice suddenly very soft. Xephos didn't move. "Go to bed, Xephos." She said, much firmer this time.

Xephos stood up straight and clicked his heels together, bringing his right hand up across his chest in salute, glaring daggers at Lomadia. " _Yes Ma'am._ " He barked, the Lumian words sounding sharp compared to the much softer Minecraftian he'd been speaking before. In that instant, Strife saw a solider, a warrior, not the overly curious student he'd fallen in love with all those years ago.

Xephos turned on his heel, his arm dropping quickly to his side, and started to make his way towards the stairs.

Strife dashed up the stairs as quickly and quietly as he could. Not wanting to be seen, he went straight to his room, walking inside and pulling the door too. 

He peered through the gap that he left. Waiting for Xephos to walk past, and, sure enough, after about thirty seconds, he did, hands shoved inside his jacket pockets, head down, though a scowl still visible on his face, eyes shimmering ruby-red instead of diamond blue. He walked straight down the corridor towards his own room, fast paced across the wooden floor.

Once he was gone and the sound of his footsteps had faded, Strife closed the door all the way. He stood there, motionless, for a moment, one hand on the handle as he thought, trying to process what he'd just seen.

He was confused, more than anything. He'd been seeing differences in Xephos since day one, but this was much bigger than small changes in his attitude or his mannerisms. What he'd just seen was like a complete personality shift. Even now, Xephos generally only seemed to raise his voice when he was frustrated. Though when he was in a bad mood he had proven to be more likely to snap. But this was different. There had been nothing to provoke him, he'd just started yelling for no real reason.

How had Lomadia kept such a cool head about it? Maybe she was used to it.. Meaning that this was a regular occurrence..

Strife took the insignia badge from his shirt as he walked across the room. Dropping it down on the table before sitting on the edge of the bed. Still lost in thought.

_He's changed more than I realised_. Strife thought as he looked up at the window, the star littered sky visible through the glass. _The Xephos I knew would never talk to someone like that.._ He sighed as he stood up again, closing the curtains and blocking out the night sky. _I suppose we've both changed a lot._ He thought as he laid down on the bed. _I'm definitely not who I was when I lost him.. When I thought I'd lost him. He's acting like nothing's happened but he can't hide from it.. I hope he doesn't expect us to go back to where we were before.. 'Cos I don't think that's going to be possible.. At least not yet.._ He sighed again as he closed his eyes. _I don't want to hurt him.. But then I don't want to leave him hoping for something that might not happen.. I'll see how he is in the morning.._ He thought as he rolled  onto his side. Not sure as to whether or not he would talk to Xephos come morning, but planning to do so at some point.

* * *

 Strife woke early the next morning, the sun hadn't been up for long, but it was steadily making it's way across the sky, lighting up the world beneath it. Beams of bright sunlight shining through the curtains into Strife's room.

He got out of bed, washed, brushed his hair, made a mental note to shave later - as he couldn't really be bothered to do it now - got changed - though the clothes he'd been borrowing from Xephos' friends were all too big for him - and headed downstairs, making sure to grab the insignia of the table, just in case someone was down there. 

He wasn't sure what he'd find, the only person was usually up this early was Xephos, but he didn't care, he was looking to get something to eat if nothing else.

What Strife hadn't expected was to find Lomadia perched on the kitchen counter, still dressed in her pyjamas, a bowl of cereal sat beside her and a spoon in one hand as she looked at something on her phone. It took her a moment to notice that Strife had come in.

"Hey William, good morning." She smiled as she saw him, putting her phone down beside her. "You ok?"

"Yeah I'm, I'm fine." Strife said as he walked over to her, smiling slightly as he went. "I wasn't sure if you'd still be here or not." Not quite true, but not quite a lie either.

She chuckled. "Yeah, thought I'd better stay. Don't really want to leave a pissy Xeph for you to deal with."

"Is he often like that?" Strife asked, hoping that it didn't give away that he'd overheard their conversation last night.

Lomadia shrugged. "More often than he should be. And I won't lie, sometimes I think he's getting worse. But, usually, he manages it on his own, you just gotta be careful around him and give him space." She said as she picked her bowl up in her free hand. "Why do you ask?"

"Just curious." He said as he leant against the counter across from her. "It's all very strange, really. I thought I'd lost him but then it turns out that he's alive and well on a different planet. He's changed a lot though, and I'm seeing that more and more all the time."

Lomadia nodded as she brought a spoonful of cereal to her mouth, chewing and swallowing before she spoke. "Yeah, I can see how that'd be rather odd for you. I mean, I've seen some pretty dramatic changes in him over the last few years, as he delves into different things and what not, but I've been around him during that. This is all very sudden for you huh."

"That's one way of putting it." Strife sighed as he pushed himself up onto the counter, bare feet tapping against the cabinet door.

"You two used to be pretty close, right. I mean, Xeph's talked about you a fair bit over the years, your name's been mentioned a lot. Heh. I don't mean to pry, but if I didn't know any better I'd guess that you two may have been a little more than friends." Lomadia chuckled, a cheeky smile crossing her face. Strife saw a flash of a pink flush across his freckles and he glanced away from Lomadia. "Knew it." He heard her mutter as she leant back against the wall, still smiling.

"Y-Yeah but, it was a long time ago, Lomadia. We've both changed a lot over the years we've been apart, I don't know if that kind of relationship would work between us anymore." Strife said simply as he looked back at her.

"I guess that makes sense. Still, you're gonna have to talk to him about that. It wouldn't surprise me if he's still hoping that you two can get back together. Say what you will about Mr. Brindley, but he holds his friendships close to his heart, even the ones that have lost strength over the years." Said Lomadia as her smile faded, looking down at the bowl in her hands.

"Well that's one thing that hasn't changed." Said Strife.

"You're gonna have to tell me some embarrassing stories about Xeph at some point. No doubt you've got a few, right." Lomadia smiled as she looked back Strife.

Strife chuckled. "Oh, there's definitely a few. Maybe one day."

"I look forward to to it." She smiled.

"Lomadia." Strife said after a minute of silence.

"Yeah?" She replied.

"Last night, I heard Xeph yelling downstairs. You were talking to him about something." Strife said carefully, not wanting to just say that he'd been eavesdropping.

Lomadia sighed and sat up straight, setting her now empty bowl down on the counter beside her. "Yeah, he came home in a rather shitty mood yesterday. I just had to be firm with him and he listened, kinda. Bit like an overgrown child really when he's like that." She said calmly, shrugging as she finished.

"But why does he get like that? The Xephos I knew would never yell at anyone like that, not even his brother. He'd be more likely to yell at himself than anyone else." Strife paused. Sighing before he continued. "The tone in his voice the way he was holding himself, the sarcastic, patronising salute.. When I saw that I, I didn't see the unorganised, enthusiastic student I loved I saw-- I saw a solider, someone who'd experienced things that most people could never even imagine. And yeah, the second parts probably true, but Xeph was never a solider, he was an engineer, and that's what confuses me." Strife continued, fighting back the tremor that was starting to form in his voice.

"He does the stupid fucking salute thing all the time when he's pissed off, it's rather annoying." Lomadia scowled. "But I thought you only overheard what was going on so how could you know about that?" She asked, tilting her head slightly as her expression softened.

Strife took a deep breath as he realised that he'd basically just confessed to spying on them. "Ok, I-I lied. I was going downstairs to get something and then he came in and I hid and watched. I don't know why, but it seemed like a good idea at the time.. I'm sorry." He said nervously, absently rubbing at the back of his neck.

Lomadia smiled. "It's fine. I don't blame you for being curious." She paused as her smiled faded. "Xeph may never have been a solider as such but he's still seen his fair share of war and fought in battles that hundreds of others didn't come back from. It's a long list of long stories that I'm not going to go into detail about now. But if he gives off the impression that he's seen some shit. Then that's 'cos he has." She said, her voice sounding firmer as her blue eyes met Strife's emeralds. "Though, I doubt using the salute as a way of patronising people does the Lumian military any justice." She rolled her eyes and smiled. Strife chuckled lightly, just managing to hold her gaze.

"I guess that makes sense." He said. "But. What's 'YogLabs'?" He asked, raising an eyebrow. "I've heard it mentioned a couple of times. Still not quite sure what it is."

"Ah. Well. That's a very good question, William. But it's one I can't answer. The only people who really know what goes on there are Xephos and Honeydew. And, maybe Ridgedog, not much gets past him. But I've got no idea what they get up too there. All I know is that a lot of science happens there and that running the place has had a bizarre effect on Xeph's mental health." She shrugged. Strife looked away from her, focusing on his hands instead. “I wouldn’t ask Xeph about it if I were you, he’s very secretive about it and you’re unlikely to get a straight answer out of him.” She added.

Strife shook his head. “No I, I won’t mention that kind of thing to him.” Lomadia smiled and hopped down off the counter, stretching her wings out behind her.

“Aanyway.” She said. “You want something to eat, since you’re down here?” She asked as she neatly folded her wings against her back, picking up her empty bowl and spoon off the counter and putting them in the sink.

“Um, yeah, that’d be great, thanks.” Strife smiled, remembering why he’d come down here in the first place.

* * *

 Xephos came downstairs about an hour later, calmer than last night but still looking a little worse-for-wear. He didn’t stop to talk to anybody, he simply walked straight towards the door and left. Lomadia didn’t so much as bat an eyelid at him. Strife assumed he was going to go and get Honeydew.

And, sure enough, Xephos came back two hours later with Honeydew in tow. The dwarf looked run-down but was otherwise his usual bouncy self. Xephos too was now acting much more like the Xephos Strife loved. The red stained lab-coat had been replaced with his red and gold jacket, his eyes were shining like diamonds again and any signs of aggression had vanished. But Strife couldn’t deny what he’d seen last night..

They spent much of the morning chatting about various things, telling stories and having somewhat random discussions. Strife mostly stayed silent, but would join in from time to time. It was interesting to find out about some of the things that Xephos had done over the years, as well as learning more about this world.

It wasn't until mid afternoon that Strife and Xephos were on their own together though. Honeydew had gone to take a nap, and Lomadia was somewhere, though Strife wasn't really sure where. Xephos was lounging on the sofa, book in hand and glasses perched on his nose when Strife had walked into the room. He hadn't thought much of it at first, settling himself down in one of the armchairs and smiling at Xephos as the brunette smiled at him. But then he remembered what Lomadia had said about discussing things with him, there were definitely things that needed to be talked about. The problem, was how exactly was he going to approach him about it.

Before they were separated, Strife felt as if he could talk to Xephos about anything, and he did, frequently. But now, after so many years of being apart, that connection just wasn't there, he wasn't sure how he was supposed to bring the subject up in conversation, and he didn't want to risk upsetting Xephos, or make him angry either..

A few minutes passed, neither of them spoke, the only sounds were the ticking of the clock and the wall and the occasional sound of Xephos turning the page of his book. Strife sat there, staring at nothing, thinking, trying to figure out how to go about doing this, it needed to be done. But how?

"Xeph." Strife said quickly, half-hoping that Xephos was so engrossed in his book that he wouldn't hear.

"Hm?" Xephos responded, not looking up from what he was reading.

"Can I.. Can I talk to you?" Strife asked, voice still quick and uneasy.

Xephos looked over the frames of his glasses at Strife. "Course you can." He said. "Everything ok?"

"Yeah, everything's fine it's just.. Xeph, I think that there's some things that we need to talk about." Strife said carefully, absently biting at his lip.

Xephos folded the corner of his page before closing his book and putting it down beside him, he sat up straight, still peering over the tops of his glasses as they slid down his nose slightly. "Such as?" He asked, tilting his head slightly.

Strife took a deep breath before he spoke. "About.. About our relationship, and where we stand now. " He said slowly, watching Xephos closely.

Xephos nodded and pushed his glasses up his nose so that he wasn't peering over the frames. "I figured this conversation would happen eventually.. Just wasn't sure when.." He paused for a moment before continuing. "What do you want to say on the matter? Something tells me this whole thing has been harder for you than it has for me.."

Strife sighed. "It's.. It's been a long time Xeph, and, I-I don't know if we can go back to where we were."

Xephos nodded again. "Yeah, I see where you're going with that." He looked away from Strife as he took his glasses off and sighed. "I'll be honest with you, Will. When Kirin first brought you here, I.. Hoped, that we could, maybe, go back to something similar to what we had before.. That's not the only reason I took you in, of course not. I helped you 'cos you're my friend, a-and I love you." He paused, taking a deep breath as he looked back up at Strife. "But you're right, it's been a long time and a lot has changed over the years, a lot has happened, to both of us.. And, as much as I'd love to have you back, and for you to be mine again.. I completely understand if you don't want that." He said slowly, hands clenching in his lap.

"It's not that I don't want it, Xeph. I'd be lying to myself if I said that I didn't want you back in that sense." Strife said. "But I spent so long thinking that I'd never see you again, there aren't words that could describe how thrilled I was to see you alive and well in front of me. I was and still am very confused about the whole thing and I'm sure you are too, but I have you back again, you're not dead." He continued, smiling slightly.

"Then what's the issue?" Xephos asked, his expression hardening very slightly.

"You've changed." Strife said simply. His smile fading again. "W-well. We both have. But I see it a lot more in you than I do in myself.. Though I am vaguely aware of how I've changed since I lost you." He added quickly before Xephos could speak.

"You've gone back to how you were before we met. Which is what I feared may have happened." Xephos said, frowning. He leant forward, elbows on his knees before he continued. "You're not as sociable as you used to be. You're closed-off and quiet, you keep to yourself and get on with your own things." He said, his voice firmer, though only just.

Strife nodded stiffly. "Yes, I, focused on my career after I lost you. Stuck to what I originally planned to do in university-"

"Work first, friends later. Yeah, I noticed." Xephos interrupted, the firmness to his voice gradually increasing. Strife nodded again. "Go on then, how have I changed? That's what you wanted to tell me, wasn't it?" Xephos continued, his eyes narrowing as the mildly annoyed expression on his face intensified.

Strife bit at his lip as he tried to figure out exactly how to word this without making Xephos angry. That really wasn't something he wanted to experience first-hand. "I dunno, I'm not sure how to explain it. But.. I guess I've seen a side of you that I never would have perceived to be possible a few years ago.. And it's just a little.. Concerning.. I guess.."

"And?" Xephos said before Strife had the chance to close his mouth. "People change, Will. And I've seen and done some serious shit whilst you've been back on Lumi, sat behind a desk doing whatever the _fuck_ it is you do. I have put my life on the line  time and time again, I've fought in _wars_ and defeated monsters you _couldn't even comprehend_. I've battled and destroyed a man who tried to  render this planet a _lifeless dust bowl_. Yeah perhaps I am a bit cruder than I used  to be, but fumbling around with an overly positive attitude towards everything never got me anywhere here, _hell_ , it almost got me killed on multiple occasions." Xephos frowned, red light flickering in his eyes.

"Firstly, can I just say that I have actually been rather successful in my endeavours over the years." Strife said quickly. "Secondly. Yeah, I know you've done a lot, you're not the first person to mention it to me. But it's not all in the past is it, there's still things happening now that are making you act... Strange.." He continued. Still being careful with how he worded everything.

"I'm a busy man, Will." Xephos said simply, sitting up straight again. "You don't need to worry about it, I can handle myself."

"I don't think Lomadia would agree with you." Strife muttered, immediately regretting it as Xephos' frown turned into a scowl.

"What?" He almost snarled, voice level but tinted with aggression.

Strife hesitated, but then decided that he might as well just get this over and done with, taking a deep breath before he spoke. "Ok. Ok. I overheard you and Lomadia arguing last night, and I can't say I've _ever_ heard you speak to anyone like that before. I didn't see the man I fell in love with stood there, I saw a solider, a _warrior_. And you were never a solider when I knew you, quite the opposite. I spoke with Lomadia this morning and she said that you acting like that is becoming more and more routine. To the point where she's gotten used to you being a complete _jackass_ towards her." He paused for a moment, taking in the unhappy expression on Xephos' face before continuing. "I don't know what the _fuck_ it is you get up to when you leave this building, but when you come back, and you're in that  labcoat; you're _aggressive_ , you're _cruel_ , you'll snap at _anything_. Now I'm no expert on emotions but I sure as hell know that when a  Lumian's markings are glowing deep red, then there is something seriously _wrong_ with their mental state. 

"And that is exactly what I saw in you then. Not the, forgetful, unorganised, but enthusiastic and playful student I met by chance and fell head-over-heels for all those years ago. Someone completely different. And I don't see that same man in your eyes anymore... Especially not when you're looking at me like that.." The strength in his voice gradually faded as he spoke, leaving it much softer by the time he finished. 

Xephos' scowl vanished, his blue eyes widening as the red that lingered in them faded. He looked away from Strife before running his hands across his face. He sighed heavily before standing up and slowly walking across the room to where Strife was sat, crouching down in front of him. He looked down at the carpet, rather than up at Strife.

"Do I really come off that bad.." Xephos said quietly, he sighed again before looking up at Strife, whose eyes had darkened, not shining their usual emerald-green anymore. "I can be a bit of a jerk can't I.." He said, a tight smile tugging at his lips. "I'm sorry you had to see me like that. I do try my best not to get snappy at people but sometimes, sometimes I guess I'm not so good at restraining myself." He paused, biting his lip before he continued, his gaze darting across the room and not remaining on Strife for more than a few seconds at a time. "I'm just, always stressed, I'm always tired, there's always something going on, something that's gone wrong and blown up in my face. I don't, I don't sleep much, these days-"

"Why?" Strife interrupted, tilting his head slightly.

Xephos took a deep breath. "Not all scars are physical, Will." He said, his voice shaking a little. Strife blinked, not quite sure how to respond. Xephos stood up again, perching on the arm of the chair beside Strife. "What happens at YogLabs is all very complicated, but it isn't something that you need to worry about. Though I admit I can be a bit of a dick sometimes when I come back from there. Heh.." Xephos said, nervously scratching at the back of his neck.

"That's a bit of an understatement from what I've seen." Strife said plainly.

Xephos smiled nervously. "Yeah, s-sorry." He stuttered.

"'s fine." Strife smiled. "Don't worry about it. That's what you say right?"

"Oi, cheeky." Xephos chuckled, leaning closer without really thinking about it. "That's my line."

"Exactly, why do you think I said it?" Strife grinned, suddenly feeling much more relaxed, his eyes brightening again.

Xephos smiled, looking away from Strife for a moment. "I really have missed you, you know." He said softly as diamond eyes met emeralds again. "I know that us being a couple isn't really feasible anymore. But, I hope that we can stay friends. Even if you head off elsewhere and do your own thing. Just, you know, don't try to drag me back to Lumi, 'cos I'm not going anywhere." He continued, chuckling lightly as he finished.

"I'm not going back to Lumi any time soon. I don't really have any means of getting back there just now." Strife said, shaking his head slightly. "But Xeph, seriously, I thought I'd lost you, and then, completely by chance, you come stumbling back into my life just like 'yeah I am alive by the way'. I'm not going to push you away, who in their right mind would do that?" He smiled, resisting the urge to grab ahold of Xephos' hand.

A gentle smile crossed Xephos' face "Thank you."

"You don't need to thank me." Said Strife.

Xephos chuckled "Yeah I do." He smiled. His gaze slowly drifted away from Strife as his smile faded.

"Xeph?"

"I really want to kiss you." Xephos said quietly, his voice suddenly rather distant.

Strife was slightly taken aback by that, but he smiled. "Xeph, look at me." He said softly. Xephos hesitated, but eventually complied, diamond eyes darkening. Strife sat up on his knees, so that he was level with Xephos, who was still perched on the arm of the chair. "For old times sake, eh." He smiled, leaning closer.

Xephos' breath caught in his throat, his freckles turning pink. He smiled, slowly reaching one hand up and gently tracing his fingers along Strife's jaw. "You need to shave." He whispered, his smile widening.

"Says you." Strife breathed, cupping Xephos' cheek in his hand.

"Hey, I look fine."

"Yeah, you do, it suits you."

The gap between them vanished as their lips met, clumsy but oh so familiar. Shock waves of warmth and joy shooting through them. They both knew that this was likely the last time they'd ever get to share something like this, and so they savoured the moment for as long as they could, though they both wished that it could last forever.

A few seconds which felt to them like hours passed before they separated, both flushed pink, hearts racing in their chests.

When Strife opened his eyes again, he saw something he wasn't quite expecting. Tears, rimming Xephos' eyes and threatening to spill down his cheeks. "Xeph?" He said, his voice soft but laced with concern. "Are you ok?"

Xephos nodded, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. "I-I'm fine." He stuttered, forcing a smile.

"Xeph?" Strife said again. They held each others gaze in silence for a few seconds before Xephos threw his arms around Strife's shoulders, holding him tight, burying his face into the crook of Strife's neck. Strife froze for a moment before quickly returning the embrace, wrapping his arms around Xephos, pulling him down off the arm of the chair and onto his lap. "Hey, 's ok." Strife said softly, his voice barely above a whisper.

"I'm just--Just so happy to see you again, to have you back." Xephos said, his voice quiet and slightly muffled. 

"It's not like I've only just gotten here." Strife chuckled.

"I know, but still.." Xephos muttered, smiling.

Strife smiled "Honestly, I'm just glad that you're alive." Xephos leant back, one hand still on Strife's shoulder as he wiped his eyes again with the other.

"Yeah, sorry about that." He smiled. "Why the fuck am I crying?" He laughed, wiping his eyes for a third time. Strife's smile grew wider but he didn't speak.

Xephos slowly leant forward again, resting his head on Strife's chest. His smile had faded, but there was still a happy tone in his voice. "You know, partners or not, I'll always love you, Will. You'll always be one of my best friends. No matter where it is you decide to go when you leave here."

"Likewise." Strife all but whispered, leaning back in the chair and resting his chin on Xephos' head.

They stayed like that for a while, merely enjoying each other's company. Xephos dozed off, Strife didn't, but he had zoned out so completely that he didn't hear Lomadia and Honeydew poke their heads in. 

They'd overheard parts of the two Lumian's conversation. But couldn't understand a word of it. Curiosity had gotten the better of them when everything had fallen silent, and even though they'd been slightly confused by what they saw, they were glad to see that their friends were happy. And to see Xephos completely relaxed like that was a rarity indeed.

* * *

 "Aw, look at 'em."

"You think they've sorted everything out, Lom?"

"I assume so, Dew. But I guess we'll find out what's going on in due course.

"'spose so. Still, nice t' see Xeph relaxed for a change."

"Yeah. Come on, let's leave 'em be."

"Yeah all right, I'm comin'."

**Author's Note:**

> Hopefully this isn't a shitty ending. I'm always really cautious about how I end stories, since I don't want to leave them with a bad ending.. ^^; But yeah, I hope you enjoyed this random little thing that happened and became a hell of a lot longer than I thought it would :)


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